Comments on: We Need Your Help!

By: Chelsea

Chelsea — Mon, 26 Apr 2010 14:33:51 +0000

I agree with Rebecca. This survey broke my heart while taking it. I know God has forgiven my past mistakes, but it is still definately hard to relive our mistakes. I pray our children, and any other young adult, does not have to fall hard like my husband and I had to. Truly, parents need to realize that 18 is the age the government chose to make people adults. The Bible does not state you are an adult just because you are 18. You still need guidance at that age, up until you are married. The flesh is too strong for a young person to handle on their own.

By: Rebecca W.

Rebecca W. — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 18:21:42 +0000

Yes that is so true! Too many times young people are left too much to their own devices and the wise counsel of elders is ignored or not given. My parents did expect me to be much more wholly independent by the time I was 18 than I now see that I was ready to be! I don’t think they realized that it may have been helpful to want to be more involved, thinking that I would have felt smothered, or that they were intruding. Truthfully, at that age I probably would have! and I hope to forge a different sort of bond with my children so that they do not see my help/opinions/advice as intrusion and welcome it!

By: Rebecca W.

Rebecca W. — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 16:37:52 +0000

I completed the survey from the perspective of a person who knew nothing about courtship and did not participate in it. I got married to my now ex-husband too quickly because we did not “want to wait” to be married, and it was a mistake as far as not knowing enough about each others hearts and personalities and goals. Now that I have been divorced and am a single Mom of two kids I have a different perspective and wonder if perhaps a courtship model may have helped that relationship’s problems from the beginning. Communication was always a big issue!
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Thank you Rebecca. One of the main advantages of someone else being involved such as your parents, is to give counsel to slow things down or speed things up as needed with accountability. Your survey/story (as a number of others) weighed heavy on my heart.

Bless you.

Steve Maxwell

By: Allie

Allie — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 22:18:05 +0000

Regarding Amy's comment above (and your response): Are you interested in non-courting stories in the survey? I did not have a courtship with my husband, but we did enjoy a great engagement and could share if you're interested. >>>>>>>>>>>>> Yes, non-courting stories are welcome as well. To some people courtship was just the process of getting married and involved dating. I've had many dating stories and they are welcome too. Steve

By: Mary

Mary — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 01:18:43 +0000

We would be very interersted in seeing a recap of the survey results, without breaking confidences of those who participate. Our church has just begun teaching courtship/ bretrothal etc. to our young people. While we, as a congregation, have never upheld flippant dating, the only known resourses in our area were things like "I kissed dating goodbye". After becoming acquainted with your blog and materials and attending your conference, God deeply impressed upon us to begin this teaching. We have utilized many of the materials published by Dr. Davis and we have the attention of our youth, reconsidering where their hearts belong, and truly trying to sort this out. Many of our youth attend public school and they are going home getting the attention of their parents with this teaching. We have covered this teaching with much prayer, knowing the cultural perception of "dating" and what we knew God wanted us to speak to them is radically different than everything they hear daily. The youth responded much quicker than we thought possible. Entire families are being touched. Yet, anything real and tangible that we can grasp and give as examples, add to our current teaching etc is truly desired. That is why we would be interested in you sharing in whatever format God leads you to share. Sadly, when we go to our local Christian Bookstore it has many books for youth on dating and boy/girl relationships, even some devotionals touch on it, so we are extremely careful when selecting materials. We appreciate your family, your transparency and desire to give out to others. This is only one area in which your ministry has greatly impacted our lives. Thank you Maxwell Family. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> I'm in prayer as to how the Lord would have us share this. I have been burdened for a long time with what I hear second hand that people are saying about how one must have a courtship. After I finish with the two workshops we will see what can be done. Steve

By: Amy

Amy — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 01:20:52 +0000

We are very interested in learning the results of your survey. Our oldest is only six, so I can’t contribute to the survey.

Thanks,
Amy
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Actually you can Amy. Assuming you are married you do have a story to tell. (The good and the bad.)

Steve

By: Lori

Lori — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 22:05:39 +0000

I filled out the survey for one experience. We have one more that resulted in marriage. One that did not result in marriage and two underway. Would you like me to fill out the survey for any of the others?

Looking forward to the results of the survey.

Lori
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Yes please fill out the survey separately for each one.

Thank you.

Steve

By: Brian H.

Brian H. — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 13:06:23 +0000

Will all of us be able to see the survey results? We are wanting to do the courtship thing, but our oldest is only 7. We want to know what works and what doesn’t when the time arrives.
Thanks,
Brian
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Hi Brian,

Mostly, the survey was to help with a couple of new courtship sessions I’m doing in Wisconsin. Then we will see how the Lord leads and the best way to share.

Steve

By: Gwenyth

Gwenyth — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 01:26:30 +0000

I would be interested hearing a bit of explanation of your statement above that some marriages “fail because God would not have them continue.”

I have begun reading your blog in the past 2 weeks or so and have enjoyed it! I’m praying, too, for the health and well-being of your tiniest new grandbaby!
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You missed the context of the paragraph. It is discussing courtship/betrothal relationships, NOT marriage. Relationships PRIOR to marriage. You had me going for a minute as that would have been a vastly incorrect statement. God does NOT ordain that some marriages would fail. I hope that helps.

Steve

By: Karen W

Karen W — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 18:20:51 +0000

I did not participate in a courtship and my children are only 10 and 7 so not ready just yet. BUT, I am hoping you will publish your survey results. I would love to learn more about courtship!
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We will be praying about how God would have us share.

Steve